Rabbi Burns preaching, yesterday
By Dougal Maguire, Theological Correspondent
Yesterday’s walk out by North British separatists at Westminster has sparked fears of new plagues destined to hit London. Continue reading
Mrs Thatcher, speaking from Hell, yesterday
By Jeremy Holby-City III – Health and well-being correspondent (North Britain)
Scotch Tory party Commander-in-Chief, Ruth Haversome, has today vented her anger at the regional North British Council Leader, Nicola Sturgeous, over what she calls “extravagant and nonsensical bonuses”, for NHS workers in the region.
A greedy doctor with Nats’ cash, yesterday
By Harold Shippmann, Health Correspondent
North Britain’s Council Leader, Nicola Sturgeous, last night caused fury amongst the medical community by raising health workers’ pay by 3%. Continue reading
Jim Murphy’s old Irn-Bru crate, yesterday
Former Labour North British Branch Manager Jim Murphy today regaled The Rancid with the details of the “most excellent week in my life”. Continue reading
Mr Boyne (centre) LOLing, yesterday
By cultural misappropriation correspondent Billy Mason
A worrying trend by the Nationalistic movement in North Britain has been developing in recent weeks, and today took a turn for the worse with a defiant walk through the Tory streets of Dumfries. Continue reading
Some fake SNP oil, yesterday
By Rupert Windsor-Sycophant-Rifkind – North Britain economics reporter
With Nicola Sturgeous’ never-ending calls for Independence reverberating around the region’s political scene, the release of the SNP-biased Growth Commission Report has sparked a stunning revelation. Continue reading
Ruth Haversome saying “independence”, yesterday
The North British Tories have been rocked by a case of Tourette’s Syndrome which appears to have affected the entire party. Continue reading
Ruth Haversome, yesterday
Labour’s chief ally in North Britain, Conservative and Unionist Supreme Overlord Ruth Haversome, last night reeled to deliver a stinging broadside to separatist leader Nicola Sturgeous. Continue reading
May & Davidson before the rally, yesterday
With Labour slipping further down the polls, UK Prime Minister Theresa May last night announced a new political era has begun. Continue reading
Fundlay campaigning with Neil Murray MP, yesterday
Lothians list MSP Kneel Fundlay last night sparked Nationalistics’ fury with an outburst slamming their use of the regional flag. Continue reading
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